Telling my secrets, part one

I went away with my friend Sally last weekend. Truth is, I've wanted to tell her for a while a bit about the lifestyle we've chosen to live. As we had been talking about her wanting to sleep with other people, I decided to tell her about thing things Sean and I have been talking about recently. She already knew, somehow, that I like women so I went on to tell her that we were thinking about "getting a girlfriend". At first, there was a little surprise, but soon after there was something else... something like jealousy.

Our conversation carried on into the small hours and, as late night conversations do, the topic of sex carried on being the main theme. Sally and I talked about our recent meet ups as two couples, and we discovered that there was a lot of flirtation there. There always has been, and we all love it. We've always joked about two or more of us going off to another room and getting it on. Sally and I wondered about this and I finally said what we'd both been thinking: "How serious are you about the flirting and sleeping with one of us?"

There was silence for a while. I started to wish I had never said anything, that I had just gone to sleep. Then she said "Well, I don't know. Can I be blunt?" I nodded in the darkness, she carried on "I don't think it's all just fun. I think I'm quite serious about it all". I rolled over to face her. Just what did she mean? She said, "do you think we actually could -" she paused, not wanting to say more in case I didn't want to know. I didn't know what to say, I didn't know exactly what she was implying. She rolled over on to her back, breaking eye contact with me. Well, this was a little awkward...

Our new toy

Some time over the Christmas vacation, Sean and I decided to spend the left overs of the money we've made from our PleasureSensor ad (most of the money went on hosting BlogStormz!) and browsed the toy site looking for something that would make me feel better about masturbation. I've never owned a vibrator before, and I've often wondered what I've been missing out on. Sean had seemed to have a re-think about his anti-toy feelings so in the end we settled on The Silencer. You could say we took the advice of an anonymous commentator ("oh, get a toy!") to heart and decided to take the plunge. If we didn't like it, it could just sit in the drawer hidden away, right?

The thinking behind getting the silencer was two-fold. First, from its description it seemed to be about the same size as Sean's (my) little friend. Second, it was supposedly both silent and powerful. The idea was that because I already didn't feel comfortable in my own company, having a toy that made a loud buzz would be even worse. Oh, and it was pink! Can't forget that...

So we hit order (and at the price of £14.99 we thought we might as well buy some toy cleaner so that we'd ultimately save on delivery (therefore saving the most money)) and waited. The package arrived almost the next day.

That very night we took it out of its packaging and popped in the batteries. It truly is silent. I was very surprised at just how wonderful it feels, and it delights Sean as he enjoys the mechanical thing. I had never imagined that it could properly please me both inside and out (my clitoris has always been sensitive and I usually give up trying to achieve clitoral orgasm on my own). Since our first night our pink friend has come out to play several times, each time bringing us both pleasure.

Yes. Life is good at the moment :)

Long time no see... er... type...

Hi guys! Wow, it's been a long time, hasn't it? Just a note to say that all is well. I've been trying to get on here to write something for a few days, but never made it through the '500 server errors'...

As you can see, I've finally migrated over to the new version of Blogger. It'll take a while for me to settle in and re-work the template. *fingers crossed for that one*

What have we been up to over the last month? Well, following my appalling attempt at Masturbation Monday in December Sean made a suggestion that came as a surprise... We got a toy.

More details to follow Sunday night...

Want a peak at what we brought? Click here.

Masturbation Monday #1

A while ago Sean came across the term "Masturbation Monday" and ever since has been sure to ask me to masturbate him each Monday. This has been rather enjoyable and has, in some way, brought me closer to him. Around a week and a half ago, Sean decided that perhaps I should masturbate myself, so last Monday was my first time. He had previously told me that I should take some time to myself, relax, find something that turns me on and just go with the flow. That sounded wonderful.

Monday quickly approached and I managed to keep my mind off of the deed for most of the day. That is, until the evening. As soon as Sean realised the day of the week, the porn was playing on the PC, he was sat at the desk with his jeans round his ankles and I was sat by his feet. We browsed around X-Tube for a bit ("How do you know about that?" Sean asked me. Well, I am the admin over at BlogStormz!... I'm therefore 'in the know' when it comes to free adult sites...) and quickly found something that Sean liked. I sat at his feet, shyly touching myself, not making much noise. All of a sudden I felt like I was sat up on a pedestal, with an audience. Not my idea of a relaxing time. Sean carried on browsing, stopping now and then at a clip he liked. He often asked me if I liked what we were watching - trying to get me to open up about what I wanted to see. I didn't want to say that I liked the clip showing a double penetration from behind. I felt too flustered, too embarrassed, and in a way turned off by the attention Sean was giving me. I wanted to go and hide in the bedroom with one of my naughty books and flick quickly to a chapter I knew would get me hot.

Masturbation has never been my forte. Perhaps because I've been with Sean since I was 14 - around the age that I expect most teens start experimenting. Because Sean was making me hot anyway, I didn't feel the need to masturbate that often. And when I did it was a very quick, unsatisfying affair that ended with no orgasm because I caused myself to be too sensitive to touch. That's what it still is to me. And I desperately need to overcome it. I sometimes wonder if it'd be better if I had some kind of toy to help me, but I realise I need the basics first before advancing to that weird and wonderful world.

So my first Masturbation Monday ended with Sean's sperm over my boobs, which I enjoyed by the way, and no orgasm for me. Not that I really tried. This Monday I'm on my period (I have been on for three Christmases in a row now, damnit), so my next Masturbation Monday will be the 1st. Hopefully, I'll be seeing in the New Year as I mean to go on!

Rules, rules, rules...

I believe a good D/s relationship has communication at its foundations. As Sean and I are still new to it all (although, saying that, we've been "in the lifestyle" for at least a year now), changes in our relationship are to be expected. It's with that in mind that I am posting up our rules again, as there have been additions :)



A good slave girl must...

1. Go to the gym at least once every 72 hours, and must not let her weight fall above 12 stone.
2. Give her master respect by calling him by an honorific title.
3. Ask permission to speak, question, masturbate or come.
4. Give an audible answer when her master asks her a question.
5. Do what her master says without hesitation.
6. Give her master a meaningful hug and kiss when she meets him anywhere.
7. Shave at least once a week.
8. Be contactable at all possible times.
9. Consult her master with any big decisions, including (but not limited to) posting content on the Internet, spending large sums of money, homework and course decisions and decisions about socials.
   
10. Be open and honest about her feelings.
    

Girls, girls, girls

Ever since Sean and I started to talk about having a girlfriend to share, I've been noticing the girls around me more...

... There's one girl, around a year older than us, who we both like. She's a little skinny, but her long brown hair and pleasant manner more than make up for it. The only problem is she has a long term boyfriend... Do you think he'd mind?

... I met my old flat mate from halls last week. I love to be around her, she makes me feel so good about myself. She's looks awesome, and actually inspired this story I wrote in April. I found out a while ago that she's bi... Do you think she could be my first?

... When I went on some job training, I met a girl I had never had the pleasure of meeting before. We got on really well over the coffee break, but never met again after that. Then, a few days later, she found me on a social networking site. Her sexuality? Bisexual. It'll be interesting, because that's what mine is listed as too... Could something develop there?

Where would she fit?

After the excitement yesterday, today I have been thinking more about a comment left on yesterday's post: "...and this begs the question, how will the girlfriend fit into your D/s dynamic (ideally)?" (Thanks to persephone)

The very night that Sean first brought up the topic of having a girlfriend for us to share, he asked whether I'd prefer a dominant girlfriend or one who would also be subordinate to him. The answer was easy - I'd want her to be in my position too. To me, it feels completely unnatural for a woman to be dominating. This goes completely against my every day interactions with most women - I surround myself with dominating people, men and women alike. But I always wonder if, deep down, the dominating women really just want to give up the control. [There is one exception, something I'll go into another time, which is when a woman has the Princess Complex. But that's for another day.]

So I think I'd be much happier if she was submissive, ideally willing to give up control and wanting to be pleasing... just like me really. This doesn't mean that she can't have problems with what she wants to do - I have problems too. I'd just want her to be willing to try to solve them. I'd want her to be fulfilled by acts of submission and service. I guess I'd want her to have the same mind set as me - open and honest, willing to try things out but also not afraid to say if something really isn't working for her.

In an ideal world, she'd be able to move in with us and she'd share my house-hold chores and our bed. Perhaps she'd be on my University course; that way we'd be able to support each other through our studies, and we'd also have the same timetable. That'd mean that we'd be able to divide every thing up really well between us when it came to looking after the house. That'd also mean that things like cooking would be quicker - we'd be home at the same time and able to get dinner on the table when Sean walks through the door. Part of me wonders if all that time together would be a good thing; but then if I got on with her as well as I get on with Sean, it'd be no problem at all - we are talking about the ideal situation, after all.

It would mean that Sean would have an extra slave to discipline... but I think he'd enjoy it more than anything. Two reddened bums are better than one, don't you think? I also think there'd be some more order to it all - as she'd be able to tell Sean when I've been bad (and vice versa). It'd sort of make it more official. And as for the sex side of things... In an ideal world there'd be very little jealousy - only the kind that makes things more interesting and intense. I think if Sean spied a stolen kiss between me and our girlfriend he'd be rather hot under the collar for the rest of the day. There'd be that extra zing to our relationship. And of course, that relationship would be three ways instead of two. That'd mean that he would be able to have sex with her just like how he does with me. Again, in an ideal world, it'd turn me on. As I think I referred to when talking about slaves, it's best to leave a sex slave wanting more; and having two slaves would allow Sean to do that more effectively.

So far, all of this sounds great. We just need to be weary of the green eyed monster, as not everything works as it does in the ideal world. We still have no idea of how to go about finding someone we both like who is both into us and willing to try a little D/s. This is all fun to talk about, but in the real world it's probably going to take at least a few months before we find someone to share our relationship with - and even then there may be problems... we have, for example, never slept with any one else (either as a couple or separately), we are both still rather young too.

But in theory, this is most definitely something I'd love to try.